The Phases of Cultural Shock

Some five years ago, one particularly freezing Winter, I went to Dublin, Ireland, to visit, a very good friend of mine who was living there at the time. Like many Poles in the 00s, he moved to the Isles seeking his fortune and - possibly - a new life abroad. For my friend, this was the first time to live outside of Poland, but in Ireland he met and befriended many others, for whom the Green Island was not much more than yet another relocation. Being a nation keen on economical migration, Poles have by now managed to build a significant diaspora - stretching from Argentina and the USA to Europe and Australia, as most every generation chose their own host country. Some have returned home, some relocated and others still have chosen to settle and build their homes abroad. In the 00's, if you were Polish, the place to go were indisputably the British Isles and Ireland (especially London and Dublin).

Naturally, my friend, who took a job in Superqueen, a local chain of supermarkets, found himself working with many Poles, and one of them became his close friend, so when I went to visit, I got to meet him as well. We spent many nights that humid Irish Winter drinking whiskey and talking until dawn and even through breakfast, and somehow along the way we shared each other's life stories. Of course, by now, I have forgotten most of what he told me, only certain things lingering between the folds of my brain. And although my memory alludes me in many ways, one thing he told me stuck, and might just as well stay with me for ever. The conversation we had that night or morning went more or less like this:

Me: How long have you been leaving in Ireland?

D: Six years.

Me: Wow, long time. You must feel really at home by now.

D: Yes. This means that I need to leave soon.

Me: Why?

D:  Because when you begin to feel at home in a place, this is when you have to leave and move somewhere else.

I have never seen him again, but my friend (who had long gone returned to Poland) told me that soon after D moved back to Germany, where his mother ran a restaurant and where he used to live before coming to Ireland.

Anthropology teaches us that all migrants (or expats, how we like to call ourselves), never mind the reason for migration, as long as it lasts for a longer period of time, normally go through four stages - or phases - of culture shock. These phases are: the Honeymood phase, the Negotiation phase, the Adjustment phase and the Mastery phase. Each phase has it's own distinct characteristics and may vary in length and intensity, depending on the individual, on their cultural background and on the degree of cultural shock, which in most cases depends on how different their culture of origin is from that of the host country. Unfortunately (or fortunately), it is not necessarily the case, that the shock will be the greater, the further away from home you move. It may sometimes turn out easier for a Pole to live to Vietnam than in Austria or France. Ultimately, some people never manage to adapt to the new culture, closing themselves up in their own, old one, others become naturalized and forget their own culture completely, and others still, adapt to both cultures (or numerous cultures), becoming bi-cultural or multi-cultural.

For me, the first three months in Egypt were extremely difficult, everything was new, including the language and climate (I arrived in mid-June on the day of the Morsy elections, shortly before the beginning of Ramadan, I had never before been a heat-lover and I did not speak a word of Arabic). The next day after my arrival, I started my new job and, - like my friend Ola once wrote on her blog about life in Kabul - although I thought I knew what to expect and I considered myself prepared for what awaited me (after all, I was well-traveled, I had lived in Russia and studied Cross-Cultural Relations!), the shock came like a blow in the abdomen, nonetheless. 

Looking back, while at first I was convinced that the beginning was the hardest, I can see now that the phase of depression came later - the Negotiation phase, which in my case lasted for about a year. Now, while there are still many things I am learning (the most obvious of them being the language), and many things I dislike, after two years, I can confidently say that I have found my peace with this country, I have built my life here and I am happy. At the same time, I am beginning to understand what D meant back then in Dublin, as the idea of moving on to the next place is slowly starting to kindle in the back of my head.

Further reading:

1.  "Culture shock", Wikipedia

2. W droge do Afganistanu, Ola's blog (in Polish)